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Lifestyles dictate success in school

The following is a Counterpoint column:

By Kathy Young

It's all about money? It's never all about money.

It's about lifestyle choices that result in less money. Your article of Oct. 9 implies that a family's income is directly responsible for a student's performance in school. Nothing could be further from the truth.

As a retired teacher who began in 1966, I've had ample opportunity to study student performance. True, most students from lower socioeconomic backgrounds don't do as well in school as their more affluent classmates, but there are many, many exceptions in both groups and reasons for it.

I am one of them. Reared in a slum by a divorced mom who worked two jobs, I graduated high school with highest honors and got a master's degree. That's because my mom had only one child, spent her spare time with me, took me to church every Sunday, made sure I did my homework, encouraged me in school, went to every school function, had conferences with my teachers, took me to the library and museums, and taught me to read early. She taught me that school was important.

My students who did poorly almost always had parents who fit one or more (or even all) of these categories: took drugs; drank heavily; dropped out themselves and didn't value school; began having children at age 16 or younger; had four or more children (which they couldn't support); had a criminal record; never came to any school functions; refused parent conferences; abused their children; taught them that teachers and police and other authority figures were the enemy. I have taught seven children in a single family without ever meeting the parents, who responded to all conference requests with hostility. It was no wonder that all the children did poorly in school and the second-oldest went to prison soon after high school. These are parental lifestyle choices. They usually do result in less income and cheaper housing, but lack of money is not the issue. The lifestyle choices result in less income.

Handing more money to an alcoholic dropout who isn't teaching her seven children to do their homework wouldn't result in a change of behavior. It also won't change her children's performance in the classroom.

Without a doubt, most children from more affluent homes do better in school than most children from less-affluent homes. The parents made good choices along the way to become more affluent, and they teach their children to make those same choices, one of which is to value education.

It isn't all about money.

The writer lives in Greensboro.

Comments (4)

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Dan [TypeKey Profile Page] said:

Oh Ms. Young how could you write such an un-PC letter and have the gall to get it printed in the N&R!!

Terry Grier and the PC dominated school board will tell you that lack of school funding, race, and the new kid on the block: "economic status" are the reasons for kids failing school. In PC land it is NEVER the fault of the parents, children, or the school board itself. The N&R is happy to propagate the PC agenda with an "exclusive" cover story plastered on the front page of the Sunday paper.

Thank you for writing what used to be obvious but no longer is due to political correctness. Watch your back however, lest you get Grier ended.

I wish you and everyone a "happy holiday" season and hope you enjoy "winter break" at or around December 25.

Carol Dunn [TypeKey Profile Page] said:

Kathy, Thank you for your well written comments. I, too, am a retired Guilford County School Teacher. I have told everyone I know that student success is most often related to parental involvement and support.

The best student I ever taught came from a project home and had an unmarried mother. His behavior and attitude showed that he had been taught well. He went to Carolina on a Brooks scholarship and graduated with honors. While I saw a small number of students who totally rejected their parents' values, this was the exception.

The letter in yesterday's paper from Mrs. Patel also showed that money is not the answer. I don't have all the answers (if I did, I would be a rich consultant)but know that parents who have high expectations, teach their children manners and respect, and love them unconditionally have the most success.

Maybe parents of unruly kids should be required to attend as many workshops as the teachers who have to deal with them.

Darryl [TypeKey Profile Page] said:

I too came from a low-income family. Neither parent graduated from high school; one because of a deceased father and 3 family members to ensure provisions were met, the other because the parents were uneducated and did not see nor feel the need of education.

Yet, my parents enstilled in my two siblings and myself that we would, at the very least, receive a high school education. Sadly, there was no money for any type of higher educational pursuits. However, after working for six years post-high school, I did enroll in a four-year college. I graduated with a bachelor's degree. I even have some graduate level credits. So, it is not about the money!

This letter writer has stated things very well. It is sad to see the way some used negative comments for a positive means and totally degrade the work of the initial writer!

Shalom

Kathy [TypeKey Profile Page] said:

Thank you all for your supportive comments. I expect some negative ones will come along, too. I am just tired of people's saying they can't get up off their butts and do something with their lives unless The Government gives them more money.

The Government = The Taxpayers = You and Me.

The term Personal Responsibility is usually lacking in the diatribes of blame and requests for more handouts.

God bless you all,
Kathy Young

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