The campaign machine: Yow, Alston
In my rounds of county commissioner calls today I talked with District 5 Republican Billy Yow and District 8 Democrat Skip Alston, who both gave me a laugh with their updates on how their reelection campaigns are coming along.
Alston told me that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are heading in town to stump for him.
"They heard I was getting contested and said they were going to come through," Alston said, laughing.
It's doubtful that Democrat Greg Woodard, Alston's District 8 primary competitor, has much to worry about. With Hillary's wins in Texas and Ohio, she and Obama probably have much bigger fish to fry.
Billy Yow said he held a big fundraiser Tuesday night with more than 400 supporters that raised about $20,000 for the campaign through raffle ticket sales, he estimated.
Like District 8, the winner of the District 5 seat will be decided in the primary. Republicans Lisa Andrews and Rick Wallace are aiming for the seat Yow holds now.
Yow said he spent time talking to folks and serving food, and when I asked if he made a speech, he said he told a joke, paraphrased here:
A successful old senator dies and goes to heaven.
When he gets to the pearly gates, St. Peter says, "Before you can get in, you've got to spend 24 hours in hell and 24 hours in heaven. Then you must decide where you want to spend eternity."
So the senator goes down to hell for what he thinks will be a day of fire and brimstone, but actually finds the best golf course he's ever seen. He gets up with old friends from Congress in a magnificent clubhouse, eats delicious catered food, smokes fine cigars, drinks expensive wine, the whole nine yards.
Then St. Peter comes back with a puffy cloud and asks the former senator to hop on.
"Your 24 hours in hell are up," St. Peter said, "It's time for 24 hours of heaven."
So the senator spends 24 hours on the cloud, wafting through the heavens, totally relaxed, comfortable and in the most serene setting of his entire life. He's never known relaxation like this.
At the end of the day, St. Peter comes back and tells the senator to make his choice.
"Wow," the senator said. "Heaven was great. I've never been so comfortable and at ease. But hell was nice, seeing my friends and having fine food and wine. So I'm going to go with hell."
Down he goes. Standing at the doorway, the senator finds a completely different view than what he remembered. The greens and fairways turned to red-hot pools and lakes of fire. His old Congress buddies were emaciated and toiling in steaming fields. No cigars. No wine.
"What's this?" the senator said. "Where's all that other stuff?"
The devil smiled.
"Twenty-four hours ago, we were politickin'," the devil said. "Today, you've been elected."
Comments (2)
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Good joke, reminds me that Alston and Yow play golf together. I wonder who wins.
Posted on March 5, 2008 10:51 PM
That's true Billy Poet. I've seen them together at Starmount, all smiling and happy. Wonder how they can be at each other's throats in front of the cameras and so friendly on the links. Anyway, we can get Billy Yow out of his misery (referring to the joke about Hell). We just need to ElectRickWallace.com
Posted on March 29, 2008 11:17 AM