News-Record.com

the pastor is treading on a thin ice (imo) - if sex in marriage is the single most important ingredient by which we gage the success of our marriage, then i believe our attention is completely misdirected. while scripture does encourage married couples to not abstain from sex for too long a period, i believe the pastor could do well to encourage its member to seek first God's kingdom and its righteousness and receive the benefits/blessings by so doing and leave the frequency of married couples intimacy to them.

Well, we probably need more than a brief blurb in a news report to know what ELSE the pastor taught and implemented. But your right, Buz, there's a whole lot more to it than sex. If his admonition were part of a more comprehensive plan, it would make better sense. I'm not so sure about the 30-day part. There are a lot of variables, shall we say. But certainly the idea of giving your spouse what they need and desire sexually is a sound biblical principle. Perhaps the teaching about moderation may come into play here as well.

we do need more info than this (very) brief AP piece.

still, the US divorce rate is lower among atheists and agnostics than it is among Christians. maybe that's the answer?

http://www.religioustolerance.org/chr_dira.htm

From the site: "The apparently higher rate among born-again Christians, and lower rate among Atheists and Agnostics may be due to the influence of financial and/or educational factors."

Some observations. Christians cover a broad spectrum of ALL socio-economic groupings, but atheists and agnostics, because of the centering of unbelief in our colleges and universities, relfect the advantages of education and economic stability in their marriages (if they bother to marry, that is). I thought the observation quite astute that many people CLAIM to be born-again Christians, but, in fact, are merely church-goers, or have religious backgrounds of some kind.

IIt has been widely known, for some time, that divorce is a problem in the modern Christianity. The Church has become diluted and weakened by liberalism, feminism, and materialism; and consequently does not provide a vital spiritual climate in which marriages can thrive.

I believe the high church rate also reflects the pervasive emphasis on sex, especially its out-of-wedlock practices, in our media-culture and social milieu, which directly affects Christian youth as well as secular. The entertainment industry has been working overtime to unglue our nation's marriages and families for many decades. Consequently, the broader church population does NOT reflect the scriptural model for marriage, but is almost as secularized as the rest of society. So, even thought there is a shortfall in the churches in this regard, it does not in any way detract from the glorious view of holy matrimony revealed in the Word of God.

Christians who attend believing churches regularly, are taught the scriptural model of marriage, develop a shared spiritual life, and receive good pre-marital counseling are MUCH less prone to divorce. Even though the SBC official's stats were probably exagerated, they do reflect a palpable advantage of TRULY Christian marriage environments.

nikos: that's funny. the lower rate of divorce among unbelievers is indeed similar to their higher than average education level (and hence their prevalance in our colleges and universities).

I wonder why that is? it's not *causation*, surely. atheism doesn't *cause* intelligence. so it must be *correlation*. think about it.

"The Church has become diluted and weakened by liberalism, feminism, and materialism; and consequently does not provide a vital spiritual climate in which marriages can thrive."

you go, girl! what we need is dogmatic, patriarchal, mystical conservatism. the more of it, the better! (just ask Iran)

"Christians who attend believing churches regularly, are taught the scriptural model of marriage, develop a shared spiritual life, and receive good pre-marital counseling are MUCH less prone to divorce."

cite, please.

look, our culture ain't perfect. and too much "liberalism" - like too much of anything - is by definition bad. but the question of whether our culture is too open, or too closed, is far from settled.

too much of what you're suggesting would be a bad thing, too. too much, and it might even be called "the Dark Ages".

"I wonder why that is? it's not *causation*, surely. atheism doesn't *cause* intelligence. so it must be *correlation*. think about it." Englishman

I think we already touched on this; but here goes again. I have "thought about it" and I think my previous comments (as well as the citation) are more than adequate to explain it. The "correlation" you speak of is simply the outworking of the sociological factors. I would venture to say that ALL persons, of whatever cultural or religious extraction who are well-educated, economically unstressed, and from a stable background would be less prone to dissolve their marriages.

I don't mean to duck the stats regarding "Christian" marriages, but there are SO MANY variables in this whole issue that it is impossible to make broad-stroke generalizations, such as: intelligent atheists have a lower divorce rate than the mass of evangelical Christians siply because they are atheists and reject most biblical marital principles. I wouldn't get so heady about a few stats. Your largely secularist and atheist colleges in Hollywood certainly do not support such condescension.

"what we need is dogmatic, patriarchal, mystical conservatism. the more of it, the better! (just ask Iran)"

Let me repeat, there is absolutely NO 1-to-1 correspondence between the loving biblical marriage model and the legalistic oppressive model of Islam. None. This is the problem with liberal humanists; you set up these straw-man myths, and pull them out of your little bag without any nuance or study.

I am deeply troubled by the high divorce rate among Christians, but as I pointed out, and as the commentators in most all the sites and sources I have viewed do as well, there are multitudes of social, educational, media and economic factors involved that all too often trump whatever weakly-held values people hold, or tell to polsters, regarding marriage. Maturity, age, stability, family environment, the affects of social mores, etc. etc. have a great deal to do with this whole issue.

The overwhelming response of astute Christian observers in the sources I have read maintain that regular church attendace, strong personal relationships with Christ DO make a positive difference - not only in lower divrce numbers, but in the spiritual depth and fulfillment that awareness brings to a marriage and family. It's not just about numbers, but about quality. There can be no substitute for the love of God in marriage or in any other human relationship.

I do not rest my case on statistics of any kind, although they can be instructive. Stats, of any kind, can be very misleading. The issue is not statistical, but principial in nature. God has revealed the way to happiness and deep fulfillment in ALL human relationships, not just marriage. And, as in all these relationships, conformity to His truth principles is the crucial factor. I have seen God heal and restore troubled, even broken marriages, that no one would have expected to endure. I have had one, and know many other Christain marriages that evidence great, stability, wrmth, love and fruitfulness.

So conformity to God's standards DOES make all the difference, when rightly understood and applied - as with everything else in life! Right?