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Welcome to the News & Record's "Jokes on You" page. Each week I'll post the new cartoon for your caption consideration (see above) and post the previous week's cartoon, the winning entries and all the other entries (see below). I will also try to talk a little about what I liked about the captions I chose and why I thought they worked. Feel free to post comments and ask questions. And remember, this is for entertainment purposes only, so please, no wagering.

LAST WEEK'S WINNER
So, whadda ya think of my selections? Agree? Disagree? Let me know what you think.
Leave a comment. Tell me your pick. Tell me why the ones I picked stink. Or, if you must, tell me how brilliant my choices are.

Whew! A lot of you used last week's cartoon to vent. President Bush took the most heat, but also taking shots were Rosie O'Donnell, the Greensboro City Council, Bill and Hillary Clinton, Michael Vick, Paris Hilton and others. Feel better?
My personal favorite was this note that came with a snail-mail entry from Florence Schultz of Greensboro: "I am 91 years old. I don't have a computer. Your paper's great."
Thank you Florence. We think you're great too.

WINNER
"Where are all the dudes in distress?"
Kris Voy, Trinity
It was the word "dudes" that sold this one. Nothing else would have worked.

THE RUNNERS_UP
"Thanks mom, but I have this on DVD."
Greg Deal, Greensboro
A close runner-up.

"Momma, why didn't Rapunzel just use her cell phone to call for help? Was the tower out of range??"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

"Mummy, why wasn't Jack arrested for stealing the Giant's things and causing his death?"
Ken Layton, Carthage

"Grandma is too big for the big bad wolf to swallow."
Steve Kindschi, Asheboro

THE REST
"Come on do you think I was born yesterday? "
Shirley Stultz, Climax

"Hillary & Bill went up the Hill...."
Bill Campbell, Summerfield

"This sounds like the Bush Administration to me. Are you sure that it belongs in this book?"
Bob Kollar, Greensboro

"'The War on Terror' illustrated By G.W. Bush"
Jamey Holder, Pleasant Garden

"What does 'void where prohibited' mean?"
Cathy FitzGerald, Greensboro

"What's A Fairy?"
Joyce Ward, Asheboro

1. "I like the fairy tale Michael Vick is telling better."
2. "Doggone it, but the Michael Vick fairy tale is better!"
3. "Mom, is a fairy tale like the story Michael Vick is telling?"
4. "If this is a fairy tale then why doesn't the fairy have a tail?"
Dick Ellis, Pleasant Garden

"No, dear, we don't use that word any more."
Sandy Emerson, Burlington

"Mom, I don't enjoy fairy tales after watching TV reality shows."
"Did Rapunzel use Rogaine to grow so much hair?"
"The Princess didn't eat her last pea so she hid it under the mattress."
"Why didn't the Emperor go to a yard sale for more clothes?"
"Mom, are you sure kissing a frog won't give you warts?"
"People who wear glass slippers need great pedicures."
"The Little Match Girl should not be playing with matches."
Joan Lux, Greensboro

"so lieing makes your nose big,, thats why you dont tell daddy about the milkman."
Mike Adkins, Madison.

"the greensboro city council all agreed to get along together. now thats a fairy tale."
Mike Adkins, madison.

"Did the government really used to be by the people, for the people, of the people?"
Chip (no last name or town given)

"Another name for Sleeping Beauty could be Froggie Went A' Courting."
"Mom, how many frogs do I have to kiss to find a prince?"
"When the baby bear got sick did it take bear aspirin?"
"I don't think these fairy tales are grim at all."
Joan Lux, Greensboro

"Mommy, what's a compassionate conservative?"
" Mommy, Why won't you read me about Snow White and the seven Congressmen?"
William Watson Purkey, Greensboro

"Can we terminate this mom? I've got an early tattoo appointment."
Gray Amick, Greensboro

1. "Look at that Mommy. The troll looks like the lady who was on "The View".
2. "Let's see, we have the 3 bears, the 3 blind mice, the 3 little pigs, and the 3 billy goats gruff. Is there one in there about the 3 pit bulls and the quarterback?"
3. "Mommy, does "once upon a time" mean the same thing as "and it came to pass?"
4. "Mommy I love this book. Does it come in a smaller, King James Version with a zipper?"
5. "Mommy, can you skip ahead to the believable parts?"
6. "The housekeeper says Daddy is like a wolf in the bed too."
C. L. Sumpter, High Point

"Mommy, why did the Witch turn Michael Vick into a dog?"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

The little boy went Pssst, Pssst, Pssst in the cat's ear. Does that mean he Psssted in the cat's ear?
Rich Ellis, Pleasant Garden

"If the old woman in the shoe didn't like children, how come she had so many?"
Steve Kindschi, Asheboro

"And then George proudly exclaimed, 'Mission Accomplished".
Jack Alford, Greensboro

"The Three Bears did WHAT???"
Jean Brockman, Pleasant Garden

"Mommy, why is the Prince making Brittney, Lindsay, and Paris ride in the Pumpkin instead of driving?"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

"Mom, I learned in school how to remember the seven dwarfs: two S’s, two D’s, and three emotions. Two S’s: Sleepy and Sneezy; two D’s: Dopey and Doc; and three emotions: Happy, Bashful, and Grumpy. Now I just wish I could learn to count to seven."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

"Mommy, why did they lock Princess Paris in the tower? Did King George Bush do it?"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

"It seems like the Three Little Pigs would have warned Little Red Riding Hood about the wolf, and then she could have warned Hansel and Gretal not to go into the woods alone. Go figure."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro

"I thought this book was suppose to put me to sleep."
Justin Holton, Randleman

"I thought you said the Cubs would never be that good again."
Wally Fox, Greensboro

Predident Bush's news broadcast"
Florence Schultz, Greensboro

"Mama, I don't think Oprah bought into any of this."
The only white stallions I've seen are at the circus and you know what they leave behind."
"Isn't Rapunzel aware that the style a short, cropped bob?"
"The soap operas were awfully boring back then, mom."
"I don't think the prince would have seemed so charming if Sleeping Beauty were awake more often."
Kris Voy, Trinity

"Is Goldie Locks one of the Spice Girls?"
"Did Little Red Riding Hood take her cell phone?"
Frank Freeman, Greensboro

"Is 'I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry' in there?"
"I heard a librarian say Bruno Bettelheim said these stories are OK for children."
"Witches, Ogres, Sorcerers, giant killers: my kind of people!"
"I know. Once upon a time and they lived happily ever after."
Max Harless, High Point

"Did the Big Bad Wolf, have rabies?"
Barbara Vestal, Greensboro