THIS WEEK'S CARTOON

Send your entries to jokesonyou@news-record.com
Welcome to the News & Record's "Jokes on You" page. Each week I'll post the new cartoon for your caption consideration (see above) and post the previous week's cartoon, the winning entries and all the other entries (see below). I will also try to talk a little about what I liked about the captions I chose and why I thought they worked. Feel free to post comments and ask questions. And remember, this is for entertainment purposes only, so please, no wagering.
THIS WEEK'S CONTEST
Hope you guys had a good Christmas.
Great stuff this week. A lot of good captions didn’t realize it was the last wiseman talking or ignored the gadget the lead wiseman is carrying. Sadly, these things cost you points. But, lucky for us, they made our job easier editing captions down.
Just a side note, camel dung was a popular subject for this cartoon. Don’t really have a point, I just wanted to see the words “camel dung” in print.
ALSO, sorry this is late getting posted and the fact that I didn't make any comments on entries this week. The holiday and all. Just wanted to say, though, that all our judges thought this was an exceptionally strong week. Lots of good entries.Pat yourself on the back. And if you don't hear from me till next week, have a happy new year!

WINNER
"Can you stop blogging? I'm sure someone will write about this later."
Brent Wooten, Thomasville
RUNNERS-UP
“No, I don’t want to be on his Facebook page.”
Eric Grimm, Greensboro
“He’s the son of God, of course he’s gonna know it’s been out of the box.“
Joel Clark, Greensboro
Really good. A coin toss between this and the winner.
You're ruining our reenactment Carl!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
“The GPS says go through field and fountain, moor and mountain and follow yonder star.”
Michael L. Creech, Springboro
"Are we there yet?"
Multiple entrants
"You fool, of course they'll be roaming minutes."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
Hey, guys! Maybe GPS stands for “Gigantic Pointing Star.”
Bill Wallace, High Point
"Google myrrh and find out what the heck it is!"
Brandon Breeze, Greensboro
BEST INSIDE JOKE“Hey... could you text Tim Rickard & wish him Merry Christmas for me??"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
Merry Christmas to you, too, CC.
First satanic light bulbs and now this!
What does take exit 22 off I40 even MEAN?!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Let's see, we traveled 500 miles and the new tax is a penny a mile..."
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
Is that the R.U. Sirius, or a star? I can't read this thing without my glasses.
Your friend Bucky
OBSCURE CULTURAL REFERENCE
Some people who know their Bible.
That child will be two years old before we even get there!
Nancy Nelson
That kid will be 2 years old before that thing gets us to him!
Bryan Tribbett
will b there by Epiphany
Joan Lux Greensboro
A bomb?! Why are we giving him a Bomb?!
(monty python) Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
I’m ashamed to say, I’m not familiar with this Monty Python quote.
From “The Life of Brian” I assume?
And the date change …Did you remember to change the date from B.C to A.D.?!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
“The date on my watch just went back to zero!!“
Joel Clark, Greensboro
And of course, a cartoon reference ...
I told you we took a wrong turn in Albuquerque!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
MATURE
Nothing really fits, here. Except maybe the numerous references to camel dung.
BEST POEM
Three wise men, bringing gifts from afar,
couldn't find baby Jesus by following the shining bright star,
so they got off their camels and tried getting directions from their i-phone,
when that failed they ended up in the desert all alone!
Nancy Nelson
THE REST
"If you keep dressing like that, they're going to haul you off and put you in a home!"
Mike Creech, Dayton, Ohio
“For the last time, forget the map and look up!"
John E. Truitt, Greensboro
1.)Take thee a right at the next dune in 300 cubits.
2.)Takest thou a right at the next dune in 300 cubits.
3.)Why do I always get stuck with the myrrh?
4.)Why do you always get to give the gold?
5.) It just keeps saying look up !
6.)Why does it keep saying recalculating route?
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
traveling on faith
even fog cant dim it
need GPS sistum b4 next uh . . . Christmas
wont b home 4 corned beef queenie
Joan Lux, Greensboro
1.) You're ruining our reenactment Carl!
2.) These frankincense fumes are making me dizzy back here!
3.) I prefer the Onstar system.
4.)I keep telling you that's a gameboy not a GPS.
5.) I can't believe you traded good myrrh for that thing!
6.) I really don't think we need that thing.
7.) Call me old fashioned but this just seems wrong!
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Hey... could you text Tim Rickard & wish him Merry Christmas for me??"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
I prefer under star over Onstar
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
1. Gaspar just follow the star!
2. That thing better be made out of gold!
3. Who are you texting now!
4. Wouldn't it be wiser to ask for directions?!
5. A wiseman once said...!
6. That child will be two years old before we even get there!
7. Enough already!
8. It's about time you decided to get directions!
9. Shouldn't we be riding those camels!
10. Why is this child so important anyway?!
11. Are we there yet!
12. Don't answer that it might be the King!
I knew this GPS would come in handy.
I'm texting the wife that we're there.
We R on frewy tking ramp to Bhem. Got gfts. Str stil brite.
Ken Layton, Carthage
o gr8 allergic to myrrh
sand in my sandles
found 2 at palm tree - will work 4 frankincense and myrrh
Joan Lux, Greensboro
"TRY THE OTHER WEBSITE: "www.wethreekings.com".
"C'MON NOW! "WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME"
"FORGET THE EMAIL. WE'RE SUPPOSED TO FOLLOW THE STAR"
Alex Potter, Greensboro
sand in my sandals
will b there by Epiphany
Joan Lux, Greensboro
"C'MON NOW! "WE CAN'T BE LATE"
Alex Potter, Greensboro
After 400 yards, turn right. Then- keep right...keep right...keep right.
I told you to charge the Tom-Tom before we left.
Just punch in the address for the manger, it should take us right to it.
Tony Hummel, Reidsville
"I thought it said to turn right at the FIRST camel, not the second....."
Wil Courter, Greensboro
Who's the daddy ?
It's probably not programmed for AD !
Probably not AD ready !
Yule need an AD converter !
Warranty good only for BC !
It's leading us astray !
Eyes right !
To the right, march !
Our wives again !
Tell Elvis to join us !
Frank C. Leonard, Lexington
* "You just couldn't trust the star, could you?"
* "Okay, enough, wise guy!"
* "I'm sick of hearing that DVD player on every trip!"
* Wii Three Kings
* "I'm telling you, the movie's not out yet."
Don Byers, Greensboro
Oh goody, I found the PERFECT gift!
Alex Burke, Summerfield
1.) I think it needs more specifics than just manger in Bethlehem.
2.) If you hadn't wrecked our camel looking at that thing we would already be there!
3.Methinks the camel did not care for your attempt to recharge the GPS.
4.)I think this GPS will work better when they launch some satellites.
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
"Get the Frankincense before we leave", I told you.
J. C. Winkler, Greensboro
"PUT THAT AWAY. WE'VE GOT MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO!"
ALEX POTTER, GREENSBORO
And they came from a far, bringing Gold, Frankincense and Mio.
Skye Dalrymple, High Point
"It's an Ipod. Kids these day just don't appreciate myrhh"
Eric Olmedo, Jamestown
"C'mon...you guys said I could give him the PSP!"
Scott Linham, Greensboro
13. The Game Boy's batteries will be dead before Jesus Christ even gets it!
14. What was that wise crack about me getting us lost?!
15. Guys let's just follow the camels!
16. Is AAA coming anytime soon?
( Another ditty)Three wise men, bringing gifts from afar, couldn't find baby Jesus by following the shining bright star, so they got off their camels and tried getting directions from their i-phone, when that failed they ended up in the desert all alone!
Nancy Nelson
Mary said, "where did you ever find three WISE MEN?"
Dick Ellis, PLeasant Garden
"I'm telling you guys, this GPS is GOLD!"
"We three kings are orienteering..."
"The GPS says go through follow field and fountain, moor and mountain and follow yonder star."
"Okay Wise-guy, which direction does your frankincense say to go?"
Mike Creech, Dayton, Ohio
"In point two miles turn right and follow the star."
Hal Koger, McLeansville
TXT GLD FRNKNSNS & MYR.
Christian Pike, Siler City
AYDY?????????? (are you done yet)
Christian Pike, Siler City
I'm not WITH Frank 'n Murray!
Not Frank and Murray -- frankincense and myrrh.
Joan Lux Greensboro
"A Gameboy for a baby, you should've got the Tickle Me Moses."
"That gps is screwy, we should've made a left at Albuquerque!"
"Google myrrh and find out what the heck it is!"
"Ask jeeves why we walked and didn't ride those camels."
"An xbox 360 - we agreed to keep it under two drachmas!"
Brandon Breeze, Greensboro
1.) It has to recalculate the route every time there is a sand storm?!
2)Turn right at the camel?! A camel is not stationary!!
3.)So we just blindly trust this Steve Jobs in his itimetravel machine?!
4.)Beware of nerds bearing gifts!
5,)There is too much camel congestion on this route!
6.)The infernal machine has led me into camel dung again!
7.)You want me to LIE and tell everyone we followed a star?!
8.)A bomb?! Why are we giving him a Bomb?!(monty python)
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
1. Garmin says to make a right at the Camel.
2 I knew we should have gotten a map from AAA
Dick Ellis, Pleasant Garden.
1. Your wife wants to know who took her Frankincense & Myrrh and gold?
2. Your wife said, "don't forget the milk and bread."
Dick Ellis, Pleasant Garden
"We've past this star three times now...would you please stop and ask for directions!!"
Ethan C. Greensboro
(1). "Are we there yet?"
(2). " I'm not wearing underpants; he,he,he.".
Erny Karoly, Jamestown
1.) What do you mean "nothing much"? Tell them to call back later!
2.) I believe the hymn says SILENT night!
3.) I can't believe you traded the little drummer boy for itunes!
4.)I still say beware of geeks bearing gifts!
5.)Try looking up manger under points of interest already!
6.)These K&W lines are getting way too long!
7.)I can't believe we both brought myrrh!
8.)Look up local resturants.I could kill for a lamb kebob!
9.)It says the weather will be hot and dry?What a USEFUL device!
10.)First satanic light bulbs and now this!
11.) What does take exit 22 off I40 even MEAN?!
12.) AC/DC is not appropriate music for tonight!
13.)Stop getting sand in my GPS!
14.)Where do we recharge it MR.WISEMAN?!
15.) You better not be texting about me and my myrrh!
16.)You two could really use a little fragrant balm if you get my drift!
17.)I told you to buy the extended warranty!
18.)Text them that we are running late due to a camel pileup.
19.)I don't know how many cubits are in a mile!
20.) Can you hear them now?
Tim Tribbett, Greensboro
1) "All I get is that "Little Drummer Boy!"
2) "I'm Dis-Oriented!"
3) "It keeps saying Go East!"
4) "Believe Me! This is the start of something Big!"
5) "How do you spell Myrrh?"
Bill Beerman, Greensboro
1)? "Hello-o-o...we're supposed to be?following ?'yon star' not OnStar!"
2)???"I already told you, we don't need your GPS---the star's right there!"
Rupert Burton, Greensboro
I said we're going to meet the son of God, not bring your Ipod!!
Joe Tripp, Greensboro
Is that the R.U. Sirius, or a star? I can't read this thing without my glasses.
Your friend Bucky
Rockit on Rockiteers!
1.) I told you we took a wrong turn in Albuquerque!
2.) I prefer under star to your ONSTAR !
3.) We're lost and my tuna casserole is ice cold! I need to stop and buy some myrrh or something!
4.) I told you to just follow the little boy with the drum!!
5.) For crying out loud!! JUST LOOK UP!!
6.)How many holy mangers can there be in Bethlehem?!
7.) We're running late! Get the myrrh out fellas!
8.) I told you the Moses brand of GPS was a BAD CHOICE!!!!
9.) I told you that a GPS invented by Moses was a bad choice!!
10.)We're lost,my feet hurt,my beard itches,my sinuses are acting up......
11.) I think I heard a baby crying 300 cubits to the right
12.) If we get there on time it will be a miracle!
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro (Hmmm,I wonder if Mom would like a little myrrh for Christmas)
W.W.J.D?
Darn GPS, I'm always getting lost.
Marcia Minsky, LosCon
Lost again with your China made GPS.
Hurry up my Muir is drying up.
Don Rankin, Greensboro
* "Wii.three kings.of or-i-ent arrreee."
Don Byers, Greensboro
* "Give it a minute to recalculate."
* "It has to lock in on the satellite first."
* "I TOLD you it said 'turn right at the stable.'"
* "'Trust me. I can find our way back,' you said."
* "I'd feel a lot wiser if your batteries weren't running low."
Don Byers, Greensboro
"We're lucky, usually those myrrh dealers are closed by now."
"I told you that Baby Floyd wasn't the Savior."
"See if they have WiFi."
"Let's see, we traveled 500 miles and the new tax is a penny a mile..."
"You fool, of course they'll be roaming minutes."
"Yeah, it's the next left but I don't think we can get over."
"Hah, you missed. How about J-8?"
Joel Tuggle, Archdale
1) Heck with that thing! I told you we should have stopped and asked directions!
2) Game Boy, frankincense & myrrh just doesn't have the same ring to it !
3) I don't care what that thing says, we follow the star!
4) DANG IT! If that thing directs me thru one more pile of camel dung.......!
5) That kid will be 2 years old before that thing gets us to him!
6) No! Not 1654 Manger Rd, BECKINGHAM! You idiot!
7) No service again! I told you to go with those other guys!
8) Call that fat guy in the red suit! He'll know how to get there!
9) Give me that thing and we'll see if it can direct my foot to your ...!
10) Are we there yet??
Bryan Tribbett, Roanoke, Va.
"Is that big star interfering with our GPS?"
Brenda Rambach, Greensboro
1.) Remember to tell them that's from all three of us!
2.) 2.) You're going to pay those roaming charges pal!
3.) 3.) Why don't you look up anachronism in wikipedia while you're at it!
4.) 4.)Text them that we are running late.Our camel had a dry hump!
5.) Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"Can you stop blogging? I'm sure someone will write about this later."
"I don't care if it says to turn left, we should follow the star!"
"Between your GPS and that star, how can we possibly be lost?"
"Enough with the GPS already; just follow the star!"
"Don't tell me we're lost again!"
"And they came bearing gifts of gold, frankincense, and an Ipod."
Brent Wooten, Thomasville
Garmin says to make a right at the next Camel.
Dick Ellis, Pleasant Garden
"It says, "RECALCULATING"
Cookie Bobko, Oak Ridge
1. "Can't you just use the STAR like the rest of us?"
2. "No, I don't want to be on his Facebook page."
3. "We have one star and you bought that."
4. "Just where would you like me to plug it in?"
5. "We could have bought 3 camels for less."
6. "Having that doesn't make you any wiser."
7. "If you play that song one more time."
8. "You traded our camels for THAT."
9. "What do you mean no signal?"
10. "I can't believe you traded the myrrh for that."
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Eric Grimm, Greensboro
"Besides electronics, little has changed in over 2000 years."
Michael L. Creech, Springboro, OH
1) Great! Right in the middle of Silent Night, you get a phone call!
2) Text him again! That is defiantly a comet, not a star!
3) If that's Herald Angel again, tell him I'm starting to get pissed!
4) Call the shepherds for directions, I'll bet they're there already!
5) Some wise men we are! We can't even find that manger with a friggin GPS!
6) What do you mean "there's no listing for Bethlehem!"
7) Look, I don't care if it is cool technology! WE ALREADY KNOW HOW TO GET THERE!!!
Bryan Tribbett
no, your not the wisest!!!!
Linda Burnette, Gibsonville
* "We're going in circles. Chuck that thing and just follow the star!"
* "Chief, didn't we just pass that camel on the dune?"
* "Trading your gold for that gadget was a big mistake!!
* "Order lunch! I'm hungry!"
* "Call a camel. I'm tired of walking!"
* "It's so peaceful here in the Middle East. I hope it lasts!"
* "Let's switch. The gas is killing me back here!"
* "Check the gold market to see if our sell order went through!"
* "Can you play something besides "Twinkle, twinkle, little star?!"
* "Pay attention! You just marched us in a patch of fresh camel dung!"
* "Download a marching tune like Sousa's Stars and Stripes Forever!"
* "We're getting close. Start playing Handel "Messiah!"
Dennis LaJeunesse
1.) If you keep squinting at that screen you'll go cross eyed!
2.) 2.) I hear this place only has a one star rating!
3.) 3.)No,we don't have time to stop by Sodom and Gomorrah!
4.) 4.) An apple was also used to lead Eve astray!
5.) 5.) You shouldn't have ditched him! He may not be wise but he's still my brother!
6.) 6.) I prefer the celestial global positioning system!
7.) 7.)Did you remember to change the date from B.C to A.D.?!
8.) 8.)What a bummer for the kid to have his birthday on Christmas!
9.) 9.)Did you remember to remove the price tag?!
Tim Tribbett,Greensboro
"You don't need the GPS, the star is right there."
Ken Cockerham, Greensboro
1. “Why do you keep calling us your Network?”
2. “I thought we agreed not to bring a gift from another millennium.”
3. “I won’t ask you what ‘text messaging’ is if you don’t ask me to explain ‘frankincense’.”
Tom Norman, Greensboro
16. GPS does not stand for Gobal Positioning Star.
17. This a Hallmark Moment!
18. Take a picture, it will last longer!
19. He's definitely not from the Orient!
20. If that's a bIackberry, is it edible?!
21. What planet is he from!
22. I hope that's tidings of good cheer!
23. We traveled from a far but I think he must have traveled much further!
24. What is that incessant ringing in my ear?
25. I told you we could travel to the past in that time machine!
26. We're in a time warp!
27. I told him to leave that gizmo in the time machine!
27. We're doomed, that gadget will change our future!
28. We're almost there, is he beaming us up?!
Nancy Nelson
"You've tried enough of your contacts...let's just go with gold & myrrh."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
1) " The date on my watch just went back to zero !! "
2) " What do you mean the date just disappeared ? "
3) " What do you mean the date on your Blackberry just disappeared ? "
4) " That's just great !!! What happened to our $20.00 limit ? "
5) " What happened to our $20.00 limit ? "
6) " You know real wise men would be riding those camels . "
7) " Can I check my E-mail ? "
8) " Is that a Gameboy? He's really gonna love the myrrh now !!! "
9) " See if that GPS can tell you where my foot is in about a second!! "
10) " He is SOOOO gonna re-gift the myrrh and frankincense now . "
11) " I knew I should have gotten him a gift card . "
12) " You know with that GPS system we could travel by daylight . "
13) " Ohhh great !! I might as well have gotten him a fruitcake . "
14) " Put that GPS away. It's not like there's a lot of traffic out here."
15) " See if you can find the video of that guy throwing a shoe at thepresident. "
16) " The cashier wished me a Merry Christmas...any idea what she meant ?"
17) " Look up my horoscope for me . "
18) " He doesn't need a Gameboy, he needs a U-Haul !! "
19) " He's the son of God....of course he's gonna know it's been out of the box. "
20) " All that money for a Gameboy and he's more likely to play with the box it came in. "
Joel Clark, Greensboro
1. "You said it was my turn after we passed the last camel!"
2. "NO, you can't change it to I-phone, Frankincense and Myrrh just because it's Wikipedia."
Eric Grimm
" OK, Mel, So what's happening in the stock market, today?"
Nancy King, High Point
29. Don't answer that, it could be King Herod!
30. It's a star of wonder and beauty bright!
31. He's just being a wise guy!
Nancy Nelson
Alright, wish one of you had the tacos?
Can't you wait and play Solitare when we get home?
You programmed the GPS to find the west star, you idiot.
Wait, I got sand in my shoes again.
Frank Beamon, Greensboro
32. He's being paged again, what's the emergency now?!
33. The ER is paging him again!
Nancy Nelson
"Ask him if he means Wednesday noon Our time or his time."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
"Ask if they can put anchovies on third."
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
"Ask if it's free if it's not here in 30 minutes!"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
"If you're going to keep playing that game, at least turn off that annoying sound!!!"
CC Cockerham, Greensboro
"I can't figure this darn thing out, I say we ask one of the camels."
"Rats, looks like there's no room in the Bethlehem Hilton either."
"I wish this GPS device could spot camel droppings."
"I still say we should give a HDTV, the Manger still has rabbit ears and February will be here before you know it."
"I still say we should give a HDTV, I hear the Manger still has rabbit ears."
Gray Amick, Greensboro
Comments (3)
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Yes , that is from "The Life of Brian".They ask what myrrh is and the wiseman says it is a balm and they think he said bomb.
Posted on December 26, 2008 2:49 PM
Cookie - You and your Garmin - Did you give it to the wise men?
I Liked the Gigantic Pointing Star, as well as the Roaming Minutes
Mine got in too late -
Posted on December 29, 2008 11:45 AM
... Oh, right! Balm. Now I remember!
Posted on January 9, 2009 12:15 PM