Wanna bet?
Bev Perdue calls Jennifer Granholm.
"My Tar Heels are going to whip your Spartans, big time."
"No way. You've got a great basketball team, but you're going up against the whole state of Michigan. We're having tough times up here, and we're looking at a national championship as a huge morale-booster."
"You know what? I'm sick of hearing your Michigan whining about tough times. If you want to go by unemployment rate, we're right behind you in North Carolina and catching up fast. We've got tough times, too, and we're counting on the Heels to pick us up."
"Well, too bad for you you don't have any arena big enough to hold a national championship game. Our home-field advantage is going to make the difference tonight, sister."
"Wanna bet?"
"I suppose that's why you called, isn't it?"
"I take it you accept, then?"
"Accept what? I'm not interested in five pounds of your vinegary barbecue or whatever you normally put up. That stuff isn't worth a box of Mackinac fudge. Let's play for some real stakes."
"All right. You talk about your ailing economy, here's your chance to unload it. Michigan State loses tonight, you send us your auto industry, lock, stock and barrel. We'll take it off your hands for you."
"You want our auto industry?"
"Sure. I think we could make a go of it. Start over. Model it after the foreign-owned companies operating in the South. We've got good workers and no union contracts. The industry is dying a slow, sure death in Michigan."
"And if North Carolina loses?"
"You can have our textile, tobacco and furniture industries."
"Right. And what would we do with them?"
"Not much with textiles, but tobacco's still profitable, for now. You'd also get a furniture market. With your Detroit casinos, you probably could stave off the Las Vegas threat."
"You're on. If we lose this basketball game, we'll have nothing to live for, anyway."
Update: Here's their real bet. Mine's better.
Another update: Kay Hagan vs. Michigan senators. Booty includes barbecue against fudge.
A word of advice to Sen. Hagan: That fudge is rich. Better share with your staff.
Comments (5)
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I was listening in on the actual call. the conversation was much shorter. Perdue, "If we win you tell me how you continue to raise taxes and stay in office. If we lose, I'll raise taxes anyhow, and count on the suckers to keep me in office."
Granholm, "If we win, I'll tell you how get an auto company CEO fired, but manage to keep the union intact, with the dollars still flowing in. If you win I'll tell you how to increase your union representation, and the never ending cash flow to your campaigns!"
"Deal." "Deal." "It's a win-win!"
Posted on April 6, 2009 10:16 AM
Michigan unemployment...
December 2007 = 7.3%
February 2009 = 12.0%
North Carolina unemployment...
December 2007 = 5.0%
February 2009 = 10.7%
(These are seasonally adjusted, hence slightly different than what the media have reported.)
Our rate more than doubled, while Michigan's was already pretty bad. So if this is a sympathy competition, perhaps this means we win.
Yay.
Posted on April 6, 2009 12:15 PM
Bev Perdue calls Jennifer Granholm.
"My Tar Heels are going to whip your Spartans, big time."
"No way. You've got a great basketball team, but you're going up against the whole state of Michigan. We're having tough times up here, and we're looking at a national championship as a huge morale-booster."* Doug
Who cares! Next week both States are being repossed by National Rental Collection Services. In fact! Both Govs are being tow to a third world recyclable Center and sold in junk yard sale.
Posted on April 6, 2009 1:25 PM
Way to go Tar Heels!
Now I wonder out loud, weather this state is going to take all the money, that comes in from this championship. Since they want to stop instate tuition for these athletes. I would be embrassed to take it.
I bet you that a real reporter would address these concerns.
Wonder where we can find a real reporter?
Most of them ((ALL) are to busy trying to get instate tution for the illegals that jumped the boarder last night.
Posted on April 7, 2009 8:03 AM
Doug J, I agree with "way to go Tar Heels!"
After that, you've lost me.
Posted on April 7, 2009 10:47 AM