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Sometime between when I was in college and now, almost every girl I know dated a girl.

During dry spells, my two girl roommates would turn to each other. A college friend dropped into a conversation in the most casual way that she didn't like how one of her girl friends kissed. I went to a party and there was some drinking game the only point of which evident to me was to get all the chicks making out with each other.

I hadn't thought of this lately until I was reminded of Sarah Silverman's preference for "the boring she can say it but I don't think I can"

As much as there was that whole metrosexual thing going on there for a little while, I've never been in a conversation with a dude who was like, "yeah, I made out with guys sometimes when I didn't have a girlfriend."

I got to wondering if there was something wrong with me because I just did it with boys, not boys and girls, like being exclusively heterosexual was the new prudish.

Is it?

Last night I was reading a women's fitness magazine at the gym before going out, and I stumbled over this article. Needless to say, the details of women's below-the-belt cosmetic surgery left a somewhat sour taste in my mouth.

I've never really understood the compulsion other women have to tinker with their bodies - tightening their tummies, pumping up their breasts, lifting their butts and, more often every year, revamping their most private of parts.

Sure, I'm far from perfect, and there are days I'd like to trade parts of my body in for new ones. And I think any women who has ever felt self-conscious being naked or worried that she's not "normal" can sort of understand the desire to remake the goods to look more like the "standard" - or more like a porn star.

I've known women with breast implants, and most of them claimed they got implants to boost their self-esteem. But I have a hard time buying that when these same women spend an evening at the bar offering everyone a chance to poke and feel their fake breasts.

And I think there's a big jump between wondering whether you're normal and jumping at plastic surgery when it comes to something like vaginal-rejuvenation surgery. No matter how much I liked a guy, I wouldn't go under the knife so that I could be more like his image of beauty or sexy.

So what do you all think about this blitz of sex-related cosmetic surgery? Does it really improve sex for women who have certain parts snipped and others enhanced? And would you ever have cosmetic surgery to please a partner?

I have a friend who will only date MILFs. I think he's on his third or fourth relationship with one right now.

With the divorce rate these days, it's not hard to find a real hot mama to date. And following a huge split like a divorce, folks generally start playing the field again.

He said that MILFs had to become moms somehow, and there's a pretty good chance that they know their way around a bedroom.

But mostly, he said, they know how to care for someone because that motherly gene has been turned on by having a kid. He also said it's fun to play around with kids, too.

As a guy in my late 20s, seeing MILFs out in the world gives me confidence that maybe one day my hottie would become a MILF too.

And not all MILFs are single. Most aren't. I remember several of my friends in high school pointing out this or that this or that guys' mom as a MILF. Since teenage boys aren't all that clever or quiet, it's not long before that mom finds out.

So I gotta wonder, what's it like for a MILF who knows she's a MILF? Is it just the same as being generally a hottie? I would imagine that the MILF title carries some responsibility (Is there a secret society?).

Also - to the guys out there with a MILF - why do you do it? Is there a particular reason you seek these kinds of women? In dating, besides having to find babysitters, what's the difference between dating a regular cutie or a hot mom?

The Iowa State Fair is the mother of state fairs. But I somehow doubt it met the father of state fairs in an "erotic corndog eating contest," like the one that takes place there.

How far is too far? Guys, when does stuff like this become a turn off? Anyone care to share an "I can't believe she did that" story? I can believe that guys try too hard, too, but it just never seems to be so comical.

I'll start it off if you like. A super cute neighbor of a friend dropped in on a party and to get him to come home with me, I contrived to get this dude -- we all called him Motoguzzi -- to give me a ride home on his motorcycle. I held tight to his waist, doing a pretty poor job of acting cold and afraid, kept breathing on the back of his ear and his neck. He dropped me off and was like, "um, yeah. See you." That was our only ride together.

I'm not sure that measures up to what these women did to a corn dog, but it's about as out-there as I get. In the morning, a guy might see me eat a banana, but he also might see me slice it up and put it on my cereal.

I was talking with a close friend this week about his long-term, long-distance relationship.

He's been dating a mutual friend for almost four years, I think, and they've been living in different states for about a year. Now she's found a job in the Triad. He's living in the Triangle.

All the time they were living so far apart - and making long drives on the weekends to see each other - he never complained to me. So I was surprised this week when he said that long-distance is the hardest thing he's ever done. And that he's considering yet another move - and possibly a change of careers - to be close to her.

I was wowed by his dedication. And a little shamed to think that I, probably, would not be willing to make that same sacrifice.

I've been in long-distance relationships; some have gone well, and others have fizzled. But I've rarely thought about all the time, effort and sheer patience that must go into maintaining and strengthening a relationship when the key players are in different places.

What's your stance on long-distance relationships? Do they have potential, or are they doomed from the start?

Let's hear some of your long-distance success stories - or horror stories.

As we've noted before, it took a while for me to come into my own.

Growing up, I saw the sporty types at the ol' high school getting up all the cute women. Later, in college, I saw that happen too. But there seemed to be a little more balance. Frat types and sorority girls got along, hippies dated hippies, punks got with punks and emo-kids were still lonely. There was also a little market for my type, whatever that was.

But one constant, it seems, is the drive to be perpetually physically fit for the opposite sex. Female eating disorders have been long been at least partially blamed on the value that our society puts on youth and image.

Is that affecting men, too?

Last week I had to buy new pants because they had started getting a bit snug. I'm on the last hole in a lot of my belts. Traditionally a skinny fella, I'm growing wider than I am taller for the first time in my life.

So, it's back to the gym, mostly because I can’t stand clothes shopping.

But as I hit the weights, I wonder. As a late 20-something, is image so important anymore as it was in the shallower high school and college years? Or is it more important, since we only have a few minutes to catch a gal's eye?

It's important for health to be fit, we know. But who do you do your sit-ups for? Why?

(Sorry for the late post this morning, all ...)

We all know office romances are supposed to be taboo.

But anyone who has ever been romantically entangled with someone at work - particularly if it's a secret - likely knows the thrill of getting it on behind your co-workers' backs.

I started thinking about workplace romances the other day, while watching Jim and Pam float along in their happy little bubble on "The Office," while Angela and Dwight fought it out.

It's been a long time since I've dated anyone in the workplace - about five years, actually, since I've had a serious office romance - but I still remember how exciting, and somewhat titillating, the whole thing can be.

What's your history of office romances? Have you had any that worked out? And if you've dated someone at work and then had things fall apart, how did it impact your job?

Lately we've talked about long distance relationships, and about moving in together.

What about mid-distance relationships?

Those are the ones where you're beyond simply dating, but not quite seeing each-other exclusively. Call 'em mid-ships.

A few years back I was dating/seeing this girl who was a bit frazzled and flighty. Though we saw each other for a couple months, it never seemed totally exclusive. She made herself available only when she wanted, and honestly, I did too.

We got to a point where we took a couple trips together, and I got friendly with her group of friends. At one point, we ate lunch with her mom.

I don't think either of us were seeing anyone else (I'm pretty sure that I wasn't, though the memory is a little foggy). We were past "kinda dating" area, but we never rolled over the hump of mid-shipping and into THE RELATIONSHIP.

That was all for the best, really. Hindsight is 20/20, and I doubt that either of us would have been happy together. She was nutty and a tad too country for my liking. I think she's married now, actually.

Anyway, the mid-ship petered out. One benefit of that situation is that there was no official breakup, since there was no official get-together. But it's a weird spot, and I've heard of others in that holding pattern before.

How many of you have been in that place? Are you comfortable there? What do you do to kick it over into the full-on relationship? Have you let them fizzle before?

Or does it have to be more organic in nature, and just flow into the real deal to be a good relationship?

I was out on the town with a big group of girls in a big city last weekend. One of my friends is getting married, and the rest of us were engaging in a little good-natured bride-hazing.

I was surprised and she was positively aghast that it took going to three bars and asking at least 50 people, mostly men, before we found somebody who was carrying a condom (or at least who admitted to it).

This wasn't a church supper we were at, it was in a throng of young people downtown in a big city on Saturday night. It's a well-known human mating ground, but nobody seemed to have come prepared to do it safely.

We came to two different conclusions about the apparent disregard for safe sex practices. I figured people had condoms at home or could procure them on the way to wherever they went together because all of that "don't keep it in your wallet" sunk in during the 90s. Why else would there be those machines in gas station bathrooms, right? My friend thought people were unconcerned about safe sex.

I suppose there is also the chance that everyone she asked wasn't out to score, but she asked a lot of people.

How many of you have a condom near at hand? I've been in a monogamous relationship for just less than the shelf life of the condoms I bought when I was single, so those are still around. It seems like even before then, I had people over for after hours enough that I dispensed a fair number to friends, too.

Sure, if people want to score that's no guarantee they will, just look at Wingman. But even people who never turn on the stove keep a fire extinguisher in the kitchen. Just in case.

I've never had sex in an airplane bathroom.

Now, I was traveling this weekend and ended up next to a pretty cute guy on the plane.

We were chatting, having a good conversation. And I started to think about how the talk would end, if we were in a movie. You know - in the tiny stall at the back of the plane, with a lot of contortions going on and, likely, lots of disruption to other passengers (hey, it's not like those bathroom doors provide much of a buffer).

I'm not really disappointed that "mile-high" doesn't appear on the list of exciting or odd places I've done the deed. I've got other stories - with locales ranging from the beach (when someone walked right by in the middle, unfortunately); to, of course, the car of almost anyone I dated in college; to public spaces like the library or an office building, after hours.

Magazine articles have been written about people who get into public sex. There are social networking groups devoted to the topic. And there are plenty of Web sites that will give you tips about where to go, what to do and how to keep from being caught.

So what do you think? Where do you stand on sex in public places? And where are some of the most public or unusual places you've gotten it on?

There are plenty of those out there.

Ann Landers, Dear Abby, Ask Him Anything in Cosmo and this feature in Esquire are just a few examples.

The Onion even offers an advice column, though I'm not sure how practical the advice really is.

In movies and in TV shows, I've seen the joke all too often from a someone who reads an advice column, tries said technique/idea/new fun way of manipulation, and hilarity ensues.

A friend of mine in college was actually the subject of a letter written in to the local independent paper by his then-girlfriend, who caught him in the act with her roommate. He was super rich, and I think the subject of her letter was whether they should stay together because of his potential. The column didn't really offer any sound advice, but the two broke up anyway.

We still framed the article for him and hung it up in his house.

Generally, most advice columns seem geared more to giving out food for thought than actual paths of operation. Kind of like horoscopes, they serve more as entertainment than anything.

Sometimes I've found the advice useful, like that thing that I read once about the thing to try in the bedroom. That worked. I think. Or that time ... well, that's about it, really.

Still, I check out the Esquire feature, and the letters section in Playboy occasionally (which does have good articles, really). Overall, I dislike the advice columns for anything other than entertainment. If you need advice that badly, then get better friends.

What ones do you read? Have you ever written in to an advice column or been the subjects of someone else's letter? Gotten a response? Have you gained any useful know-how from them in mags or online? Or are they just entertainment?

A married couple I'm friends with recently hit Inferno downtown for the first time. They're in their 30s, with a young kid, and this was their first weekend off in a long time.

When they told me Inferno, the club in the same building with Rum Runners, was their destination, I laughed. I haven't been in there yet, being too turned off by the '70s getups on the mannequins in the windows and the ridiculous wigs they're wearing.

My friends had a blast, they said. It was ridiculous. And campy. And definitely worth a trip.

I'll admit I've had trouble getting into the Greensboro club scene. Heaven is fun, but the music doesn't do much for me. The N Club and Red Room seem hit-or-miss. I know a few people who swear by Remix VIP downtown, where the Flying Anvil used to be, but I haven't been in that building since I went there to see a Cat Power show there. And Jabs Ultra Bar on Lee Street always seems busy, but I've never really felt compelled to stop by.

Instead, I'm more likely to hit up an old standby, probably a bar - like College Hill Sundries over by UNCG or Fishbones on Walker Avenue. Those are places where I'm sure to meet someone interesting and have a shot at a good conversation.

Am I missing something in the Greensboro club scene, though? If you're up for dancing or an evening out, which hot spots are you likely to hit up? And are there certain places that are best for meeting guys or girls?

Tucker Max, if you don't know about him, is hilarious. Sometimes vile, but often funny.

Checking up on his site, like I sometimes do, I ran across this blog about his move to Los Angeles.

I've never been there and am not too sure about whether I want to go, especially after reading his comments and seeing Californication -one of the best shows on TV now.

I have moved around a bit, though, and have a way to find a bead on the local culture. It begins with finding a decent dive or non-Hooters sports bar on the first night in town - because you want a cold beer after moving all your crap in a new place.

Next, find a good independent restaurant and a non-Starbucks coffeehouse. Between those three things you can meet a few folks and get a bead who is where and what's going on. It usually takes about six months of doing this type of thing before you're really settled.

That's what works for me. How about you? Is there a club or organization that you search out? A certain type of establishment you seek (like the YMCA, yard sales, country club, biker lounge, exclusive club or dive bar?) It would be good to hear what's hot about Greensboro, but I'm more interested in how you find out what's going on when you move to any area.

How long did it take you to feel like you're really plugged in?

Sorry about the late post today, all. The rain's throwing me off my regular schedule.

So last weekend I was poking through a used book store when I found a hilarious book of dirty limericks, some dating back more than a hundred years. Most of them were so filthy I couldn't even write the first line here - and the book was made even funnier by the fact that it was totally serious and academic, with footnotes and everything.

I found myself propped up between bookshelves for about 20 minutes, alternately giggling like a third grader and being totally appalled that anyone's mind could be that dirty.

Dirty talk's funny, but I wouldn't ever call it a turn-on.

I'm more likely to laugh than to get thrilled when someone tries out spicy language in the bedroom. I think people generally come off as ridiculous when they try to talk dirty, whether it's in person, on the phone, or through text messages or some other format. It's too contrived.

How do you feel about talking dirty to someone or having someone talk dirty to you? Is that sort of thing a turn-on? And how do you successfully toss that spice into your sex life without turning it into a joke or breaking the mood?

A few years ago, I stopped judging potential conquests by whether a guy had a ring on his finger.

It's not that I'm into married guys; quite the contrary, since I'd hate to set myself up from the first to be competing with another woman. Besides, it's an ethical no-no for me. Though I've gotten involved with guys who were already in relationships, dating a married man, to me, is crossing a serious line.

But it's tough to tell now whether or not a guy is married. A ring on that key finger could just be an accessory. And I know a few guys who, though they're married, have never worn a ring - they don't like wearing jewelry; it's uncomfortable; they'd fidget it off and lose it; whatever the reason.

So how, other than if a guy comes straight out and tells you, can you be certain someone's hitched before you spend much time chatting them up? I'm not talking about planning a wedding and future babies' names here, or anything; it's just a waste of a few hours at a bar if a guy's already sharing his home and, possibly, his name with someone.

Have you unknowingly hit on a married person before? What's your strategy for finding out if someone's attached or not? And do you have any horror stories of relationships with married partners?

I do almost everything Wired magazine tells me to, so when they recommended iminlikewithyou.com, of course I signed up. When I saw the f-word, an "OK" button that said not OK but "whatever" and a customizable ticker that includes CNN and gawker, I was in love.

But like a lot of the love in my life, I'm not sure if I get what's really going on there.

It's not exactly a dating site, but calling it social networking means putting it in the same category as linkedin, which is so wrong. You get to see people's pictures and a little personal blurb, but if myspace is a shot of green apple pucker, linkedin is a V8 and facebook is a bud light, I feel like ininlikewithyou is the mutt offspring of Hot Topic and a bookstore, shaken, with an olive.

What I know is that in a couple of hours of being logged in there (not counting the nights I've stayed logged in at work by accident when I went home), I have had interactions with strangers, and I've actually wanted to strike up a conversation with them. You get people's attention at the site by either asking a clever question or giving a clever answer to someone's clever questio and you are drawn to look at people's pictures and bio by that cleverness. So it's contrived, but contrived in the way that genuine, in-person attention seeking is. And the tone is filthy and adorable.

Iminlikewithyou claims not to be a dating site, but some of the questions are baldly sexual. A lot of them would look perfectly at home on a bathroom wall.

I hope some of you will sign up and friend me, a la our facebook and myspace pages. And for those of you who have tried online dating, I'd be particularly interested to hear whether you think iminlikewithyou's setup would make it easier to assess someone's date-worthiness online.

While hiking with a girl-friend several years ago, she turned her ankle, fell, knocked her knee on a rock and scraped her leg.

Fortunately, the ankle wasn't too much of a deal. She was wearing some good supportive boots. But the knee and scrape were a big deal, in a big way, to her.

I've played a few contact sports over the years. She played soccer - which can be every bit as rough as many other games. After we took a break and found that her ankle was OK and she could walk, we moved on.

After a while, she complained about the pain in her knee and the scrape. More and more.

I'm no super macho-guy. A bad hangnail can ruin a day for me. But the knock and the scrape didn't seem to be all that much to me.

Then again, I'm no girl. And here's why I say that. Apparently, women feel more pain, which I can understand.

Armed with that knowledge a few years ago, I might have attended to my friend's injuries a bit better. For the record, they wound up being not that serious - a bruise and a scrape that didn't really even need a bandage.

That doesn't validate my reaction to her ailment, "Walk it off," which I'll blame on a history in contact sports. She took it in good humor, and we still cut the day short.

Reading that article on pain got me to thinking about dumb things that people say when they're misinformed. For example, when you meet someone out at night, start jiving, and then you joke about how you think elementary teachers must be dumb because they only have to deal with children.
Then you find out that the girl you're talking to is a teacher. (This actually happened to me. After the drink in the face, I now respect all teachers.)
Or how you think lawyers are money-grubbing scum, only to find out that her pops is a corporate attorney. (Never happened to me. Most lawyers are much more valuable than many people give them credit for.)

It's too late to go back in time and not tell my friend to "Walk it off." But how do you remove your foot from your mouth in those situations when you've swallowed it, shoe and all?

Do you have any gems of your own to share? How'd you recover? We can all learn from each-other here.

Bonus! Check out Ruby on iminlikewithyou.com!

The age of the cheesy come-on or the casual pick-up line apparently isn't over.

I was filling up my car at the Texaco on Spring Garden yesterday when a guy walked out of the convenience store there, got into his truck and slowly pulled up next to my car. He leaned out the window and said "Can I ask you a question?" Followed by: "Has anyone told you yet today how beautiful you are?"

I muttered something semi-polite and awkward, and he went on his way. Afterward, I burst out laughing. Who says stuff like that in real life? And how is the object of a line like that possibly supposed to come up with a response?

I'm not so slick thinking on my feel, particularly when a situation requires a sharp or witty comeback. And I rarely struggle more to respond than when a random guy tosses a cheesy line my way. I know my face betrays my struggle between laughing, blushing and rolling my eyes when a guy comes out with something about my daddy being an astronaut (come on, you've all heard that one, right?) or how tired I must be, having run through his mind all night.

Those are some of the worst lines I've heard - but I'm sure you all could add some memorable lines you've heard - or used - to the list. What are your worst-rated pick-up lines? And what's your response when someone tries to use a line on you?

Hooking up is different for women than men, according to one author.

Yesterday I heard WUNC's "The State of Things" discussion with Washington Post reporter Laura Sessions Stepp, which said that college-age women these days diss love in favor of the one-night stand, hooking up or whatever you call it.

Stepp said because of that, women are missing a shot at love, gain a warped sense of self (I'm paraphrasing here) and that running with "the boys" -in the feminist mindset- may not always be great.

So, I called my brother, who's a victory lap student in college.

He said that among his friends, some people hook up after a party, and others don't. But his closest buddies have girlfriends.

"There's always going to be someone hooking up somewhere," he said.

Well, is that so? Or are women more likely to not be concerned with the relationship, and take the "guy" line of thought - that gettin' some is gettin' some - and that's all it is?

Or, as Stepp seemed to say, is one of the reasons that people -women especially- are quick to hit the sheets is because of ill-defined thoughts on feminism and an overly sexualized culture?