Better living through the Internet
Here's an Internet dating story you don't hear every day. A friend of mine took a girl back to his place recently and when it became obvious things were going in the direction you would expect them to go when I start a story like that, the girl said "I have genital warts, but I'm not having a flare-up right now so you'll be OK." Then she went into the bathroom to get ready.
She spent so long in the bathroom that my friend got bored, he said. Where did he go to pass the time? Right to his computer, and www.cdc.gov.
He had (of course) planned on using a condom, but he found out from the CDC's entry on genital warts that they can be transmitted even when there's no visible evidence. And what's more, he didn't think a condom was enough protection from all of the contact that might spread the disease.
When the girl finally emerged from the bathroom, she found a wiser, much less turned-on man and he asked her to leave.
When my friend was telling me this story, I was only thinking of the hilarity of the bathroom door shutting, time passing, and instead of turning on SportsCenter or...uh...whatever it is guys do while a girl is in the bathroom getting ready to get it on, he was looking up genital warts on the CDC web site.
What do guys do while girls are in the bathroom, anyway?
Now -- even though I don't know the precise words he used to dismiss her -- I think he might have been kind of harsh. I sort of thought we lived in a more enlightened age than just booting somebody like a leper if you find out they have a cold sore or whatever. But on the other hand, I also don't think that this was a night of intimacy forged from a deep and abiding affection -- I suspect his casual dismissal matched the tone of their acquaintance.
So is there a right way to throw on the brakes? All us girls get taught that no means no at any time, under any circumstances. But we're not really used to hearing that from guys, once things get to a certain point. I'd bet it was pretty jarring for that girl to hear. Is there a kind way to say, "scram?"
Comments (4)
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Knowing that women tend to be more sensitive than men, it can be really hard to do so with any kind of tenderness.
Also, I'll argue that women can be just as thickheaded as the guys when it comes to taking a hint. Especially when blinded by passion. Sometimes, like your buddy, you just have to be a jerk about it.
Posted on November 7, 2007 11:17 AM
Overall, his opinion was the night could have been entirely different if someone would invent a condom that offers more coverage.
Oh look. Someone has. We brainstormed some names and some marketing strategies, most of which, I'm sorry to report, are too filthy even for me to consider posting here. If your imagination runs the way mine does, you won't have much trouble replicating our work.
Posted on November 7, 2007 12:04 PM
I would've assumed she was trying to blow me off by telling me she had genital warts.
If she took a long time to get ready, i would think she was waiting for me to give up or trying to decide if she wanted to have sex too.
I would've asked her more questions about genital warts and turned the conversation from sexual to an infectious disease Q&A. somewhere in asking too many questions, she might get frustrated and leave. If not, I'd just have to end it all by saying "I'm sorry. This is kinda freaking me out and I'm not really interested."
Kudos for telling him before they got started and I would give him kudos if he didn't tell everyone about her medical business.
Posted on November 7, 2007 2:23 PM
Well, Chronicles of the Wingman, technically he didn't tell everyone about it, just me and my boyfriend. I'm the one who told everyone. And it was part of a roundup of all of his recent exploits -- or rather, his recent strike-outs. This was just the most entertaining one.
Posted on November 7, 2007 2:51 PM