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Meet the parents


During the holidays this year, my brother's girlfriend was brought home to meet my mother for the first time. She was nervous, I could tell, but things went well.

Later though, my mom started to pick my brain about this girl — who is great, by the way. She asked me if she cleans up around the apartment that she shares with my brother. (I have no idea.) When I asked her why she was wondering that, she responded that she noticed my brother making her plate for her and then putting it in the sink afterward. My mother thought she should have made her own plate and then cleaned up afterward, even though she was a guest in our house. Yeah, my mom is that old-fashioned!

My response to her was "I'd be a nervous wreck to meet you." But if my mom had to go that far to find something wrong with her, then the girlfriend probably did alright.

So what does it take for a significant other to impress your parents? And how far have you gone to impress a boyfriend or girlfriend's parents?

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Comments (4)

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One of the great things about being middle aged is that I no longer concern myself as to what her parent's might think of me. I really don't give a damn. If I'd taken that attitude when I was young I would probably be happily married today.

Oh the joys of going gray; had I known I would have dyed my hair gray at 21.

Ruby said:

Meeting one boyfriend's parents was almost enough to convince me to break up with him. We had been dating for more than a year and were seriously considering a future together.

From the moment his dad gave me a hard, cool handshake and introduced himself with his first and last name --uh, the same last name as his son; the same last name that son wanted me to have -- I was whatever is the absolute opposite of comfortable.

It felt like a job interview for a job I instantly discovered I didn't want.

I was the one who drove for hours to meet him! He could have at least smiled. The idea of that man being grandpa still gives me the chills.

No wonder that boyfriend was such a mamma's boy and ultimately, more work than I could handle.

The hardest I have ever tried just involves being well-groomed and polite. Beyond that, I count on their son's judgment being adequate to recommend me. If it's not, there's nothing my best company manners can do to overcome it.

James Cole said:

Until she becomes a member of your family, your brother's girlfriend should be treated like a guest. Would your mother expect other guests to make their own plates and clean them afterward? Well, maybe, since every house operates under different rules.

I never had the chance to bring a girlfriend to meet my parents, but when I went to meet a girlfriend's parents, I always remembered to be polite and to never put my hands anywhere that would get me beat up or killed.

Permanent New Guy said:

When I first moved here, I went out with a girl that turned into a 3 year relationship. She lives in Sacramento now. I think another blog talks about being in our own bubble, hence my present dilemma of being the "new guy" in town still probably. Long story short, here parents were intimidating, and we had a 15 year age difference, so I was not sure how that would go over. Her mom flat out asked my intentions point blank. Here is the kicker. We have been broken up a looong time now. I still get Christmas cards from the parents. I guess I won them over.

I am not sure if that is good or bad. Sometimes (not in this case) having the parents like you makes the girlfriend not like you as much. Any thoughts on this?

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