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Dishwasher-safe. Batteries included. Operators are standing by.

Preface: I know the amount of ridicule I deserve to get for posting something like this.

Has anybody else been channel surfing late an insomniac night and stumbled across the "adult" hour of the home shopping network? Did anybody else find it hypnotic, sort of like a battery powered, silicone, life-like, pink lava lamp? Or maybe a little bit like "The Joy of Painting?"

The devices themselves look like what would happen if you took an MIT contest to make a better-than-human mechanical body part and dunk it in a vat of estrogen. Estrogen or the pure, distilled essence of Lisa Frank.

That paired with the saleswomen/announcers/hosts, the creative ways they came up with to describe the devices' function and their effusive praise -- I couldn't look away.

When I started writing this post, I didn't have a goal for it. But now I've looked at the home shopping network programming guide and find no reference to this show that I'm sure I saw. I used the Home Shopping Network's site to search for a couple of the products I saw advertised. No dice.

But please, somebody tell me that I'm not the only person in the world who has watched this show.

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Comments (4)

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Lucy Ohl said:

While I must confess that I have never watched that particular show, I do find HSN generally hypnotic, exactly like "Joy of Painting".

And now, god help me, I may watch this show. It sounds pretty awesome, in its own special way.

Joe Killian said:

I think you're hallucinating.

About sex toys.

Adorable, Lisa Frank-esque sex toys.

Whatever you're on, it's time to start sharing.

xxx said:

yeah, i love that show. the people speak so calm, like they are going to lull you into buying the product.

"oh I like the glass ones best, they are soo hard."

alright chickee.

Ruby said:

XXX-- That's just what I mean! And they talk about it like they have test driven every single one of them. I just find myself thinking if they spend that much time becoming knowledgeable about their product, when do they sleep or go to the store?

So what channel is it on? I have to convince Killian that I'm not losing it.

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